Is Oatmeal a Form of Torture?

I am done. Mealtimes have become horrendous. Unless I am serving mac 'n cheese (preferably Trader Joe's mac 'n cheese which is insanely good), the first words I hear are "why did you make THAT? I don't like it. Do I have to eat it?" Do I need to state the obvious? All of these comments are before a single morsel has been tasted. It's annoying. It's frustrating. And frankly, it's really starting to piss me off. I used to like to cook. Most adults consider me a pretty darn good cook. So I have a plan. Oatmeal. If everything I make is so "awful", then why waste my time? Breakfast, lunch, and dinner, oatmeal. On weekends I may add blueberries as a special treat. And think of the cost savings...I have a few projects I'd like to do around the house. I figure six months of oatmeal could finance some very attractive curtains. I've researched the nutritional content of oatmeal and I think it's a viable idea. With the money savings I can still afford vitamins to fill in any gaps. In my studies I found the following: the Quaker man was chosen for the cover of the box because "the Quaker faith projects values of honesty, integrity, purity, and strength." Are they kidding? Can they guarantee these qualities if my kids eat their oatmeal??? Sign me up! Except. And I'm sure you knew this was coming. Would it be child abuse? Would my neighbors call child protection services? Or would I be the envy of all the other Moms?  How easy would mealtime be? What would I do with the hours of time I saved at the grocery store and slicing and dicing?  Or...Would I be cursing my children to a life of loving bland mushy foods? Was that so terrible? 98% of the U.S. population eats meat and potatoes every week and is very happy. Who was I really torturing? Me or them?  Except.  My children have moments of amazing culinary appreciation. Ryan is 3 and loves sashimi. Caitlin likes asparagus. How can I throw away all of that had work??? It took more perseverance and patience than I thought I possessed to get them this far. I'm going to hang in there for a few more weeks, but the threat of oatmeal is lurking as my new weapon. Those Quakers may be smarter than they get credit for.